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Maybe I'm a riot?
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One of my many fires this year. cc-by-sa Laura Hilliger
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I struck some chords last week and several of you lovely people responded. That was validating, and my ever-weakening ego and self-esteem had a little tea party*. I was also made aware that my reply email wasn't working here, so I had to mess around with two servers' DNS records. I fixed it, it was a pain in the ass, but DNS success is a secret smile for *everyone* in the world of tech.
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* I often think of facets of my internal world as individual and personified. My Body, as an anthropomorphized abstraction of me, has the attitude of a 90s, white, gender neutral hiphop poser. There are little miner dwarf men in my cells who fight my sicknesses. Spinach is their superfood.
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There is a feminist riot punk heart.
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I've heard that people think I can be "volatile", but really – what do they except from a girl on fire? Sometimes I'm a dumpster fire, true, but the vast majority of the time that riot heart of mine is using prescribed fire to burn for a balanced system. I've often been encouraged to extinguish my fire. It is (obviously) the people who are driven by ego (power/status) who are most likely to make the attempt. It pisses me off when people do that, but I find it much, much worse when people listen to the rumors and intrigue of ego monsters, and can't see the difference between a documented community champion and obvious ego bullshit. Seriously people, what do I have to do here!? I'm such a nice, friendly, helpful person :/
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Maybe I need help?
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Don't take the final links in this week's newsletter as any sort of a...erm "uh oh Laura's on a spiral" kind of share. They're about death, which apparently happens to all of us. I was recently given a Memento Mori as a gift, and it's in the same room as my desk. That's not why I think about death daily. I just do. Neuro-atypical and whatnot. "Daily" might be an overshare, but I'm suggesting you think about your own mortality every once in a while.
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